Where Am I Going in Life?

Hey all,

I hope everyone is doing well and had a good holiday season!

My life is not where I want to be at the moment. I graduated high school and went immediately to college, just like I had planned. After that, my plans didn’t really work out, which is okay, just off-putting. If you had asked me what I would be doing at 24, I would have told you that I would be working as a case manager at a social services agency serving youth or people who have been involved in the criminal justice system. I would definitely not have told you that I’d be working at Target with very little aim for my life, just recently having broken up with my boyfriend. The plan was to graduate college, do my volunteer year and figure out what I wanted to do, start a great career, and fall in love with an amazing man. Nope, that’s not what happened.

Did you ever see Men In Black 3? Hopefully you did, because otherwise you won’t understand my point here. There’s an alien in that movie that can see a vast variety of outcomes depending on what one person does in any given situation, and I think life definitely works like that. For every action, there is an opposite and equal reaction, right? Right. There are so many variations of what can happen based on one or two decisions. I decided I wanted to date my friend of 3 years that I was living with. Did that end well? No. Why not? Because life is weird and timing can be a bitch, among many other things. Is this where I wanted to be right before I turned 24? Nope, but I’m hoping it’s where I’m supposed to be, even if it sucks right now. I’m not an optimist, so it’s hard for me to see the big picture and be okay with what’s happening around me and to me, but I think it is important to realize that a lot of things in life aren’t permanent. Am I going to work at Target forever? Hell no. Am I going to date a boy, instead of a man, next time? No, because boys are stupid, and people in general are stupid. Will I figure out what I want to do with my life? Um, yeah, I’m not so sure I will. Will I make sure I go on big adventures and not allow someone else to dictate my life? Yes, to the extent that I can. Can I join a jiu jitsu class so I can gain some more confidence? Yes, I can. There’s always something I can do to improve my life, even in a small way.

Do I know where I was going with this blog post? No, but I’m hoping you all got something out of it, even if it is just optimist crap that I’m spewing.

You got this. I got this. Hopefully we all survive 2017.

Always,

-M

P.S. Sunday Candy is a very interesting song and I don’t know why I like it so much, but go listen to it.

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